Life is perfect all of the time.
At least, that’s what we think when we look at the social media accounts of celebrities, friends, and other connections.
No one dares peel back the curtain of the way things truly are in their world, or at the very best, it doesn’t happen near as often as it probably should.
If you’ve ever tried to take pictures with children, I’m sure you understand the frustration of 100 attempts to get just 1 to 2 good shots to share with friends and family.
We take that approach with us everywhere we go, though.
We hurry into work each morning, perhaps pausing briefly before we open the door and convince ourselves that we must wear a smile into the office.
We look around at church where other families seem to have it all together and without peering into their homes believe the lie that nothing bad ever happens in their world.
Every other parent’s kids make straight A’s, do their chores when they’re told, can speak 5 languages by the time they’re 8, never talk back, go to bed the first time you tell them, never have a bad dream or get their clothes dirty.
Every other wife’s husband buys her flowers every week, takes out the trash with a smile, fixes things around the house, has a job where they can take a vacation every other month and always listens to understand her every feeling.
Every other husband’s wife understands that he truly means “nothing” when she asks what he’s thinking about. They never have bad days, they love to clean up after everyone in the house, they don’t mind raising the children by themselves, or working all day, then coming home to do 90% of the housework.
As I mentioned, life is perfect all of the time.
We know we don’t believe this, yet we are too ashamed to be transparent or vulnerable when things don’t happen in life the way we planned.
So whatever the situation requires, that’s the mask we put on and parade around in so no one gets a look at the pain, the suffering, the heartache, or the destitute state we’re in.
Who among us wants to admit we need help?
Too many of us are independent and proud and determined to not let anything slow us down or affect us to the point of showing our reality.
This is why we won’t stop wearing masks.
Independence and pride can be great tools when it relates to work ethic and areas of performing with excellence.
But we don’t let it stop there because these arrows in our quiver are familiar to the touch, so we pull them out to use during times where we need to be utilizing other options.
Our humanity doesn’t allow room for perfection. Yet we think everyone else’s does.
I think that in order for us to break this cycle, there are 3 main avenues for us to attend to.
1. Engage More
Whatever social media platform you frequent, you’re probably saying to yourself that you already do this, that you’re too engaged.
Just because you’re connected to hundreds or thousands of people doesn’t mean that you’re truly engaged.
Engagement requires involvement.
Engagement requires involvement. Click To Tweet
To be more engaged, we have to intentionally seek out valuable relationships with those that make us better people.
We have to more engaged with things in our life that grow us instead of what causes complacency.
I even talked about this topic in a previous post about busting out of complacency.
2. Empathize More
In the U.S. with the abundance we enjoy, it can be difficult for us to identify with the hardships others endure.
Even in our own backyard, we have those that endure hardships. In fact, even under our own roof, we are met with tough times in life.
Because we are so familiar with pain, loss, difficulty, this gives us a greater sense of relatability to those who’ve endured the same or similar road bumps in life.
The things God allows to impact our lives, we can interpret as a product of life instead of an opportunity for us to help others in the future because of our experiences.
If we allowed ourselves to be more transparent for the sake of others, our empathy would shine through and we’d find more instances where we can be of service.
3. Elude More
We need to practice our juke moves on some things that have become too distracting and time-consuming in our lives.
We need to be more elusive with things such as social media at times when it’s not profitable.
Eluding things that weigh us down or we think are important are some of the primary causes of our mask-wearing behavior.
I know I just mentioned we need to be more engaged, and now I’m suggesting to be more elusive, but we need both.
We just don’t need to get them mixed up.
We need to be engaged with our children for example, and elusive with inconsequential things.
To each of us, there will be some variation of these items, but we need to prioritize.
Don’t be afraid to show the real you.
Who we all are can be a little scary when we think we’re putting it on display next to a façade of perfect people.
Since there are no perfect people, don’t be afraid to put yourself out there with other imperfect people.
It might not get easier to do this, but if we practice, it can allow us to act on our frustration of feeling the need to don a mask of supposed perfection in life and allow us to be real.
We can each contribute to one another by implementing these strategies and if enough of us participates, then the pressure will loosen and we’ll wind up helping each other more than ever before.
Can you do it?
Can you commit to leaving the mask and the “what if they see me for who I really am” behind?
What are some other ways you’ve found possible to breaking out of this way of thinking?
Comment below and let me know.
